Ideas, Thoughts, Techniques on being a good Slave
It is a question that many submissives ask.
How do you be a good slave?
How do you do what is required of you?
To be honest, it isn’t a question that can have a definitive answer. The world of BDSM and S & M is so vast, with so many areas, that it is impossible to pinpoint “this is how you do it properly”. For example, a slave who undergoes small penis humiliation has an entirely different set of regulations, for want of a better word, than a sissy maid has. Likewise, the sissy maid has different requirements than a cock and ball torture slave.
So the question you should be asking is how do I be a good slave? The answer to that lies very much is what type of s&m activities you are “into”.
It should also be noted that while it is important to be, or at least want to be, a good slave it is equally important to have a good Mistress, one who actually knows what she is doing.
There are hundreds of women out there and on femdom cam sites who think it is easy to be a dominatrix. You call a guy a pig or a loser, maybe slap his balls a few times or give him a few whacks with a cane and that’s all there is to it. Wrong.
Take a read at our new post on erotic punishment -With video and audio clips
On so many levels. A good Dominatrix, a REAL Mistress, will understand that a slave can only be a good slave if he is effectively nurtured. That might seem strange to some. “Nurtured? They’re slaves. You treat them like dirt don’t you?”. Technically you do but you have to remember, a slave is like a pencil. If you break it, it’s no good for you. Likewise, if you break your male slave then he’s no use to you after that.
A proper Domme will take the time to find out what a subs area of preference in BDSM is and then what his limits are then pushed them to the edge but not way over them. Only with a good mistress can a good slave be found.
So back to the question that brought you here. Firstly, you need to admit what turns you on. You need to admit to yourself you want SPH, CBT, sissy maid crossdressing, boot worship or whatever it is about BDSM that gets you off. When you are ready to admit it to a dominatrix, you will be able to be a better slave.
You need to accept that fundamentally, femdom, BDSM and S&M are fantasy. Lifestyle and permanently live in slaves do exist but the majority of submissive males, especially the type who are reading this, are in it for the fantasy.
Want to learn about hairbrush spanking – The art of good old fashioned spanking OTK with brush, slipper, flip flops
They want to be owned, made to serve and be dominated but only for as long as a session. You can always be a sub to females but a femdom session is a different thing. That is why you need to admit what you want and be detailed. It’s no good saying “I want to be humiliated” to a Mistress. Humiliated how? SPH? Cuckolded? Fat Shaming? Name-calling? Boot or ass worship? There are 5 examples off the top of my head, and there are hundreds possibly thousands of other examples.
If you just say “humiliate me” then she has to totally guess what you really want and if it’s not what you are fantasising then you will not respond to it in the way that is expected. Do you think this will make you a good slave? Hardly!
Likewise, if you like cock and ball torture but you neglect to tell her, hoping she can read your mind, and she goes down the route of anal play then you will obviously resist this and begin to act out. That is no good to anyone.
There are two types of female domination. Sensual and strict. Sensual is where a soft-spoken Domme will have a slave but be kind to him. Speaking nicely, having him rub her feet, fetch her tea etc. She is always in charge and he always knows his place but it is a calm environment where a slave is treated fairly.
Have a look at our femdom humiliation stories
The other type is strict. This one is where the sub is treated like dirt. Slapped, kicked, mocked, ridiculed, humiliated and insulted. These sessions are more brutal, for want of a better word, and the Dominatrixes need to know what kind of sub you are. If you are a sensual type, then having her sneer and spit at you isn’t going to work. Likewise, if you desire a man-hater then her asking you to fetch her a cup of tea isn’t going to get your motor running.
So now we have established that you need to tell your Domme what you want and enjoy, how do you be what is expected? Well, the fundamental number one rule is “Always be respectful”.
This woman is naturally dominant and as such sees herself superior to you. This isn’t part of the roleplay or fantasy. A true Dominatrix feels this way 24/7.
Therefore she must always be treated with the utmost respect. That means calling her Mistress (teenage Dommes sometimes prefer Princess), following her commands to the letter and not answering back.
A good slave will know what his owner wants before she asks. If he sits down after a days shopping, she shouldn’t have to tell you to take her boots off and rub her feet. If she bends over, you should worship her ass before she has to tell you. However, you need to be careful you don’t overstep your boundaries. An overeager slave is not a good slave. She might not want you salivating and touching her so it is a very fine line, one which must be treated with caution.
Check out our sissy humiliation Videos
Of course, being a good slave is not always about doing exactly as you are told. Some subs like to be punished. You might enjoy a whipping, a spanking or a belting. Maybe some face slapping or hair pulling.
You can “step out of line” and receive this but still be considered “good”. A good Domina will know the difference between disrespect and purposeful wrongdoing as part of the roleplay fantasy. You don’t need to worry about not being seen as a good slave if you need to be punished. It doesn’t make you a bad one
So in conclusion, being a good slave is not an exact science nor totally reliant on the submissive. To be a good sub you must show respect, be honest and don’t be afraid. If you are genuinely afraid of your Mistress when she isn’t doing her job right.
Read our bdsm rules here
You should fear to displease her but if you are terrified then you will not be effective. To be a good slave you need to be scared of upsetting her but not so terrified you piss your pants at the thought of angering her. It is a balance. One which you will find as you enter the world of BDSM and find a Mistress
Below is some Bdsm Rules for Slaves to follow
1. I should always address my Sir/Mistress the right way.
2. I most certainly will make use of my safe words when necessary and also without worry.
3. I am going to adhere to Sir’s/Mistresses directions to the best of my capability at all times
3. Orgasms are a privilege because they are owned by My Mistress/Master. I am going to request Sir for authorization to cum but will give thanks to him or her after everyone.
4. We will dress as well as groom myself personally to please Owner.
5. I most certainly will be truthful with my Sir/Madam.
6 ) I am going to understand myself personally and also be truthful with myself. ( temet nosce )
7 ) I most certainly will do anything whatsoever I can to satisfy my Dominants, as well as I, am going to continuously take into consideration and also look for different ways to please them.
8 ) I will be able to communicate truthfully and also clearly with my Sir, which includes the right utilization of safewords.
9 ) Any specific incentive or advantage is provided to me by my Sir/Mistress, I am going to give thanks to him or her and by no means seek out any specific reward or privilege without authorization.
10 ) In the event that I have already been in violation of such rules in thought or even behaviour, I am going to report to my Sir and even request forgiveness.
11 ) I am going to embrace suitable correction and physical punishment for almost any transgression I have been guilty of.
Rules for Myself As The Dominant
1. I will at all times act within my submissive’s best interest, regardless if it contradicts my individual desires and/or needs.
2. I will continually be clear and also truthful with my submissive but will pay attention to their requirements as well as needs and wants.
3. I am going to constantly respect the utilization of safewords by Instantly stopping the activity that triggered the utilization of the safeword as well as taking care of any specific requirements that the submissive has got.
4. I am going to provide you with proper protection from the maximum harm as is possible to my submissive. This consists of injury from other people, them-selves, or even from myself personally, and also consists of psychological and also emotional damage in addition to physical.
5. I will Take control of my submissive. This consists of however is not restricted to the following:
I am going to utilize my valuable time, attention, training, control, also my cruelty, to seize my submissive away from their comfort areas and also pressure them to bend, stretch out, and also grow.
I will not press him or her past the cracking point, however, I will constantly make an attempt to get them to it. I am going to regard the hard limits which are established by and also for my submissive.
I will issue physical punishment together with incentive/reward depending on merit. I most certainly will continuously look for different ways to Take control of my submissive, and also will take them further.
6. In the event that I violate any one of these guidelines, my submissive has got the right to revoke her/his permission, permanently or even for the time being , in so doing discharging herself from all of the accountability as well as demands enforced by the rules , demands as well as requirements I have put on her/him .
Keep in mind that the sub is an individual, and so needs to be permitted a safe word and also secure space to recuperate after actively playing. Even though they agree to be your property or even the plaything, they have to be well looked after to perform their responsibilities appropriately.